make it ideal

20 Apr

over lunch today with my team it occurred to me that we all have our ideal setting for conversation.  i think this goes a bit beyond the questions of simply ‘who’ we like to talk to, because if we pick an ideal setting then we are including the ‘what’ we talk about, even if that ‘what’ is a combination of many things. so if i were to ask someone this question and they said ‘a hockey game’ then we would be able to ascertain who they like to talk to and for the most part, what they like to talk about. with very, very little exception the person who chooses a hockey game isn’t looking to dine on duck l’orange and talk parliamentarian politics. i think the answer to this questions says a lot about you, but not in a judgemental way, simply in a way that might provide insight to the type of person you are. perhaps that question could be embellished and ask for more details but i like the simplicity of the question and how much information it could potentially provide. i guess we all have a place where we are in ‘our element’. although, after a bit more thought on the matter, if you’re a person who doesn’t like to talk, then my whole line of thinking falls apart…but doesn’t everyone have an ideal setting for a conversation regardless of how much conversation there may be? never mind.


Posted by on April 20, 2009 in Uncategorized


9 responses to “make it ideal

  1. cflores

    April 20, 2009 at 2:09 pm

    My favorite place to converse is at a coffee or tea house. I think the owner of Starbucks had the right idea. I like a place that is non-threatening – relaxed ambience – where I can sip on some java and relish anything – family, friendships, future business ventures, etc. etc. Actually, the ambience means more to me than the topic. I think -perhaps I should try a topic I’m not really into …or perhas NOT!
    I do like the idea of having lunch with your department. I am going to talk to my team about doing this more often! Maybe at STarbucks! LOL!

  2. texasbuckeye

    April 20, 2009 at 6:35 pm

    do you find it difficult to let conversation digress into something unplanned? if you were with work friend would it be easy to talk about something other than work?

  3. R Sheinberg

    April 21, 2009 at 7:20 am

    Interesting that you bring up the location for conversations. As be begin to shift from “traditional” methods of communication the locations shift, too (aka this blog for one). I have become very comfortable with this form of communication. I find myself going to this form more and more (Old dog new tricks philosophy). Yes, people have comfort areas for conversation but as our world shifts we must shift too if we are to remain connected. The luxury of sitting with colleagues or friends just to chat becomes even more remote as time becomes the factor. We have to make time for all of it now.

    My only fear is I might begin to ramble using this form of communication, wait a minute, I have….

  4. texasbuckeye

    April 21, 2009 at 7:33 am

    as tech driven as i am, i don’t want to lose the aspect of being social. i know the two can coexist it’s just a matter of finding the proper balance.

  5. cflores

    April 21, 2009 at 1:01 pm

    Ditto Texasbuckeye …whoever you are! The “social stuff” is BIG for me…one of my strongest intelligences is interpersonal. I also beleive one of things we have lost in our society is the ability to communicate – the personal touch we give to others. We all need it – perhaps you’re right buckeye – the two can and must coexist!

  6. Heather Tate

    April 22, 2009 at 12:24 pm

    My ideal place for talking is at a house over some wine (but not too much!) It all depends on the house though. Some houses are more welcoming, thus welcoming conversations. Others you know right away that you better agree with the owner of the house of you will find yourself on the street!

  7. Jeri

    April 23, 2009 at 3:53 pm

    It doesn’t matter where–if the who is right.

    I find something very intriguing.
    I think we are thrown together in the workplace with people for a season and they become our circle(s) of contact and influence–and we find a way to converse , interact ,and connect around many different topics and in many different venues. And I often think, except for the job connection, we would have nothing at all to say.

  8. texasbuckeye

    April 23, 2009 at 6:52 pm

    i’m not sure if it is work that provides the conversation as much as the proximity. as social beings, we like to find something to talk about and often work can be what provides common ground.

  9. karen vanek

    April 24, 2009 at 4:26 pm

    At first I wanted to say that my dream location to talk is under a tree on a temperate spring day.
    Then I thought of that spontaneous chat I had the other day with a woman waiting for a ride as we left the theater, or the man on the bus in Mexico year ago, or with a former student via email. Each conversation created a new opportunity to hear someone’s opinion and view of life. Each conversation was given with the generosity of opening up personal information to enrich each other. Each conversation was a risk that paid off and made me feel more human. So, where must not be important so much as the realness of the interaction.


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