i’m sensing a difference, i just don’t know what it is

23 Aug

at the end of a busy week of training i adopted what i like to call my ‘i don’t care attitude’ going in to the last session i was leading.  to be honest, i should really adopt this attitude far more often and i’m not sure why i don’t.  to be clear: it wasn’t that i didn’t care about the content, people, etc, it’s just that i wasn’t going to let anything rattle me.  regardless of what happened that day i wasn’t going to stress over it and it’s a good thing i had that attitude on that particular day.  in between multiple room changes, guest speakers that usurped my time and a few other monkey wrenches thrown in there, had i been worried about how the day was going to go then i would have been a mess.  judging by the reaction to my absurdly flexible responses i have to believe that the attitude went over well.  i was thanked profusely for my flexibility.  here is what is eating at me:  why don’t i always have this attitude?  i have a few theories:

  1. it was content i knew backwards/forwards and i enjoy having he discussions that i was going to have that day
  2. i was tired from a hard week – it’s amazing how post-stress we can relax so easily
  3. i was familiar with the campus and teachers
  4. i finally hit a point in this job that i have turned the corner and this was just the first of many experiences like this i will have
  5. the stars aligned and that’s just the way it went that day

i’m not even sure i could replicate the whole experience.  i’ll have many, many opportunities to do so as sessions crank up this fall and i hope i can adopt the same attitude, but for some reason i’m not hopeful.  my preparation for a session usually involved a wicked series of dread that culminates when the session begins.  i’m hopeful.

1 Comment

Posted by on August 23, 2010 in cube life


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One response to “i’m sensing a difference, i just don’t know what it is

  1. Susan Paul

    August 25, 2010 at 11:56 pm

    Interesting. I was the same way. My feelings were, “No matter what happens, I’m not going to get my panties in a wad.” And…… these days with only 1 hand, that’s really difficult! 🙂


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